Tuesday, January 24, 2012

My son is here! Birth story (long)

My son was born on Thursday, January 19th at 117pm weighing 7 pounds and 11 ounces.  He's healthy and we are so in love.

On Jan 19th at 8am we went in for an induction at 40w6d. When I arrived, I was almost completely effaced, 4cm dilated, and still -3 station.  I totally thought I'd get a bit of pitocin, contractions would start, and less than 24 hours of labor and some pushing, my baby would be here.  I was wrong.  I knew there would be a chance that a c section would happen, my OB did say that was a downside of induction and I proceeded anyway, and I don't regret that one bit.

At 9am, we finally got settled into a room and they started my admitting paperwork, did my initial exam, and I met my nurses, OB on staff to deliver me, and midwife. They hooked me up to monitor me for a bit.  At about 10am, 2 nurses and the midwife came in sternly but kindly telling me to get on my side. I did so immediately and asked what happened and they said this is very normal for baby's HR to decel and that I needed to relax a bit.  I was taken aback by that bc I didn't realize baby's HR had gone down.  I immediately started crying and they said it is normal and happens all the time, not to worry.  DH finally got keyed in that something was going on and came over to me.  He told me later he thought I had taken a dump on myself bc of what the nurses were saying since he missed the initial part of the drama.  Thanks H.

They decided to hold off on giving me pitocin so they could monitor the baby more.  I am not sure but I think they may have given me something in my IV at this point to calm me down since I was crying so hard and was so nervous.

At about 1030 the nurse came and said we would start the pitocin, lowest dose of 2 (out of max 20).  At 1115am she came in and increased it to 4. I wasn't feeling or having any contractions from the first dosage.  A few minutes later my nurse rushed in along with the midwife and 2 other nurses, saying they needed to turn the pitocin off, baby wasn't tolerating it very well.  I look over at the monitor and all I remember was 68.  And I know that wasn't my HR I was reading.  Lots of things were a blur by this point but I asked if baby was ok and they said yes this happens but baby's HR had deceled a lot and was taking a while to come back up, hence turning off pitocin.  I know more people came in at this point and I swear it was like a horrible movie where I look around and there are 10 or so people in my room around my bed.

I remember a dr or a midwife saying that it wouldn't hurt, that they were breaking my water to see if there was any dark liquid in there. I remember getting stuck with needles, one of which was tetrabuline (no clue how it's spelled), they said to calm my uterus. People were telling me to calm down, I was asking for my H and I could see him past the nurses/drs and the look in his eyes kind of terrified me bc he looked scared too and he's never scared.  I was crying my fuckingeyes out at this point and my body was trembling like crazy. Nasty horrible things were going through my head about what might possibly be happening to my baby.  God, my heart just rips to shreds remembering this scene. No wonder I didn't want to write it all down.
Finally my H was next to me and he was holding my hand saying it would be ok, and the dr was next to my bed and I said "are we going to do a c-section? is my baby going to be ok? Please hurry and do whatever you need to do.  What's going on?"  And she said that although decels in baby's HR happen and can be common, this was the second time in a short time span that it happened, and it was taking a long time to come back.  That they didn't know why it was happening. And that she believes a c section would be the safest thing to do as soon as possible.  I don't even remember if I was given a choice to continue with labor to see if we could do a vaginal delivery.  Even if I was that option, I know 100% I wouldn't have taken it. I wanted my baby out asap bc I wanted to know he/she was safe.

I have no idea how long that all lasted but the next thing I know, I'm being wheeled away, nurses are handing me things to sign, I hear ppl ordering the anesthesiologist.  I asked if I would be awake for the c/s and someone said "I hope so."  I remember being heartbroken at the thought of not being awake when my baby entered this world.

We got to the operating room and again it was all a blur. I just wanted my husband there but he couldn't come in until the sheet was up and I was prepped. They gave me a spinal, which didn't hurt really bc I was given a numbing shot beforehand, which did sting by the way.  The spinal I could feel every bit of, no pain, just pressure.  Not fun. The whole time I'm being prepped I'm watching the screens for my baby's HR - I felt good that I kept seeing it fluctuate from about 118 to 140.  I still kept asking the nurse next to me if everything was ok.

Finally my H came in and sat next to me and I swear I felt so much better. I don't know how people do this alone. I was so terrified something would happen to my baby. Not as important to me was that something would happen to me, as I didn't really think my induction would end this way.  I have no clue what me and H were talking about, I think he was asking me if I felt anything, and I didn't.  Just pressure on my body.  It was weird hearing the doctors talking and I swear I heard something about "move that kidney" which kind of grossed me out.  They did communicate to me every now and then that they were almost done.

Next thing I knew, I heard the dr say "It's a BOY!  You have a BOY!" And I heard my son cry his first cry.  So loud, so healthy, the most beautiful thing I think I've ever heard in my life and my tears felt like a damn waterfall.  I will never be able to describe how I felt to hear that sound.  I looked over at my H and asked him if he was healthy, to go look.  And he said "oh my God we have a boy."  H went to go to him and he was gone for a bit and the first thing he said when he came back was "he looks like your dad!"  Which is so true.
I finally met my son a few minutes later, couldn't believe it.  I could hardly see him through my tears and wished so bad I could hold him but I couldn't just yet. H was holding him and I don't remember what happened next but they took him for his exam and were finishing me up.

We finally went to recovery where I stayed for about 2 hours, as I was bleeding more than normal.  Apparently I was losing so much blood that I was going to have a transfusion but I asked if we could wait on that unless it was absolutely necessary.   I was passing a lot of clots and the bleeding wasn't stopping.  I kept vomiting and was lightheaded and majorly sweating. And I never sweat. My H and my son were doing skin to skin in the chair next to my bed in recovery.  Poor H, he kept on asking if I was going to be ok and why I was sweating so bad.  I had like 4 IVs running through me, which was really weird.  Time passed and I guess things settled down bc we eventually made it to our room where we spent the next 2 nights.

Things have been busy at home, trying to get settled in. I love my son more than I thought I even could.  Watching my H with him has made me fall in love with him all over again, as cliche as that sounds it really is true.

So, my delivery didn't go as planned, and I'd really like to forget most of the details about it besides the ending, which is all that really matters anyway.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

I love my dogs.

I think they sense that big changes are coming to our household. They've been very clingy with me lately, following me from room to room. They're also really curious every time I go to the nursery, which is often. They'll sniff around and after a minute settle into a comfortable spot and just hang out with me in there.

We've started leaving the nursery door open so that in the mornings they can go lay in the sun. I hope they make the transition ok when the baby arrives. These 2 are my first kids, after all.

Helping me put clothes away:

Laying in the morning sun.

Saturday, December 31, 2011

Omg, so many clothes!

My friend Kim gave me a ton of stuff today for the baby! I couldn't believe it! I picked out the gender neutral stuff, and there's still half a bag left of boy's stuff. My cousin gave me girl clothes so either way, I think we're good!

Here are some pictures!


Cream velvet outfit from Children's Place:

Pants. Mark said browns can be for a girl or a boy:


And all of them laid out!

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

New phone and camera, huge picture difference!

For Christmas, my husband got me an i.phone - I LOVE IT! I really hated my An.droid 2 and had to do a hard wipeout about once a week. LAMES. And it was SLOW. I am so glad to be rid of it. What's bullshit is that I would've had to wait until April 2012 to get a promo price on the iphone from Veri.zon unless I opened a new line. I didn't want to do it, but H just went ahead and did it. He was probably sick of hearing me verbally abuse my piece of shit Moto.rola An.droid 2 phone.

Look at the difference in picture quality!! Same closet, same lighting setting. Unbelievable, right?
Old phone:

New i.phone:


Friday, December 23, 2011


I can't believe it. Woohooo!

Nursery update and photo.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

My Baby Shower (photo heavy)

This weekend was my baby shower at the Old Spaghetti Factory in Fullerton, and I just loved it. It was a beautiful day. My mom flew down for it and I really can't say who enjoyed it more.

Kim and Ann Marie did a great job planning it (AMP you were very missed), thank you so much to them for everything, and to Courtney for helping and Aline for an awesome cake and Jenny for my cute cookie favors! And Courtney even took pictures! You can probably tell which ones were from her below. lol.

Some of my aunts and cousins came and most of my friends. God, I really couldn't have asked for a better party to celebrate the upcoming arrival of this baby.

And the Pooh. Oh God thank you that Pooh was all over this shower. I mean, I hoped for it but being as low-may as I am I didn't want to push. Hee hee.

The rest of the pictures are by me unless I specified otherwise.

My cake that Aline made and the cookie favors by Jenny - my friends are so talented! (pictures by Courtney McManaway)

Pooh themed centerpieces. Squeal! (pictures by me lol)

Clothesline of Pooh inspired clothes, weeee!

The fingerprint tree! There was also a Wishes for Baby guestbook but I don't have any pictures of it yet. See Claire and her cat Curry's wishes for baby here. Lol!

My invitations!

Some of the baby's loot. Everyone was so generous. I really couldn't believe it. We literally have 99% of everything that we need and want!

My mom!

And all of my beautiful girls that I love so much: